the four right chords can make me cry

broke stuff today! you mean ppl, probably assumed it was only a matter of time right!?! but hey, its not my fault. my colleague spilt lemon tea on the floor... and as i was bringing 2 empty plates in, i dramatically slipped, with fancy hands-flying-around action. but i dont blame her lar.

anyway, back to my dramatic rendition of my mishap. so this one plate few up in the air, a graceful arc of pure terror it made, (i witnessed the fall out of the corner of my eye as i felt the floor slip out under my feet). by an amazing display of latent gymnastic prowess (fwah.) i managed to prevent myself from falling and facing UTTER humiliation and also managed to keep one plate on the tray. Alas, it was one plate too few... so i was merely humiliated. (as opposed to UTTER humiliation)

yes, i am so familiar with humiliation that i have a grading system for different degrees of humiliation. ALL the customers turned around and gawked at me... i felt so.... humiliated.

on another note. my brother just told me the other day that Utt is bi. at the sight of my crestfallen face, he spake thus:
" dont worry la, you still got chance....
well.... Half a chance."
CLASSIC! freaking farnie!

well today was a bad day on most counts. this requires a little background. my boss wants to fire me, kind of. He told me that this week is like my probation week, if i dont do well, i "dont need to come back to work". reason being "not stable carrying the dishes". well ok, im not great at it, but up till today i didnt break nothing. but now that i DID break something.... well....

my boss, (name's ben. which is confusing, cos i know so many bens) seems to think me an incompetent blur idiot. thats nice. so he keeps making me be the runner, the one carrying the dishes out of the kitchen and serving them, saying i need to practice. fair enough. but because i'm incompetent in his eyes, he's always looking out for mistakes that i make. so naturally he finds em. makes me feel so demoralised.

when we just opened, the kitchen told me we were out of "lemongrass". so i go tell ben and he sends me down to cold storage to buy 2 boxes of "lemongrass". his description to me? "white box, costs about 4 bucks"

so there i am, eager to get it fast and redeem myself. i go there and cant find any lemongrass. ask the cold storage guy but he says dont have. so ask him to go check, and turns out that they do have lemongrass, just that he only knows it as serai (he was a malay guy). then i find that they dont have it in boxes. not wanting to waste time, and not having my handphone (which was in my apron) i just buy 80 cents worth of lemongrass and report back to work.

ben was on the phone. but the moment he saw me, he smacked his head. darn. i screwed up again it seems. turns out they wanted lemongrass TEA BAGS. How was i to know?!?! felt so humiliated. he was betting with my colleague that i would screw up. she stood up for me, said i wouldnt. but ben had the last laugh... all at my expense of course. felt so hurt and run down....

after that he told me that all he wanted me to do was to go give the complimentary tidbits to the guests when they sit down and serve water, no need to take orders or lead customers in. cos he didnt want me to screw up. then as he walked off, he told my colleague to look after me, like i was bound to do something dumb if left unattended. low point of the day.

when we started to get into the swing of things and customers were coming in, one of the cooks walked past where i was standing and caused this whole stack of bowls full of pineapple rice to fall to the ground where they inevitably broke. I, being so near, reached out and actually caught a bowl and managed to save that one. But unfortunately, that made me look like i was the one who knocked them over. which was what ben saw. sigh... i felt so wronged.

then i went to go break a plate on my own. fabulous.

it's days like these that make it hard to NOT think of myself as an incompetent person. I tried my best...

but hey, not gonna let it get me down. William Hung spirit!!!

thank you for reading this excruitatingly long rant. i needed to get it off my chest and get some salve-of-sympathy to soothe my bruised ego.

posted by beckyboo @ 11:29 PM